Category: Uncategorized

Feeling Yucky at 9… or 49

Sometimes my little guy withdraws. If he is angry or annoyed or sad or experiencing anything beyond what most of us would describe as simple, unpleasant emotion he clams up and there is what feels to me like an impossible wall to penetrate. I keep trying. I keep hoping. It breaks my heart because, for […]

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Gray Skies at Gardiner

Sunrise today is not how it’s been. Two minutes past and the sky is gray; not bright and colorful as I’ve been experiencing so often.  This sky-scape captures it’s own magnificent beauty. I am appreciative of the feeling it has to offer. I love that I would not normally interpret this moment as beautiful though […]

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Unpopular.

What has become of my decision to leave an unhealthy marriage despite the pressure and advice from the majority to “work it out”; “wait for the magic”; “honor and obey”?  What happens to a person when they find their voice against the shouts of popular demands preaching the contrary?  What happens to a person when […]

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I Am a Rock (But What is Inside?)

My friend and I used to have this discussion about how we were often referred to as rocks as in: “a rock”.  That context brings about an image of being tough, unpenetratable, able to deflect hard things without feeling them.  Paul Simon also pairs that image with being “an island”.  I have been both of these […]

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17 Years Earlier (Excerpts from the Birth of Tariana Jade)

Today is my 3rd baby’s birthday.  She is 17 and drove me home tonight.  She is just as beautiful today as the day she was born.  I have a ritual of sorts to go back on the birthdays of my children and re-read my account of their births. Many times I share the stories with them on their […]

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The Magical Smell of Birth!

I love the smell of birth!  It’s been over 9 years since I delivered my last child and I can still, when I close my eyes, bring the smell to my senses. There’s nothing sweet or fragrant about it. However, it’s the only thing that smells like it. I have had the amazing fortune of birthing […]

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Love, Worth & the Color Purple

I am slowly allowing feminine into my bedroom.  To begin to feel secure enough in my worth to choose the things I like without having to explain why I like them. I no longer need to justify my actions, my choices my preferences. I can put purple in my bedroom.  First I began with a […]

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Lost and Found in the Arboretum

As I literally walk the paths in Arnold Arboretum in Roslindale, MA, I relate it so easily to the path of my life. Incredible contrast and changing leaves. Intertwined with fewer constants that will stay green for the season. I climb and descend making choices on which way to go. I can notice and allow […]

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